Questions For Reflection

Origins & Early Influences
• In the memoir, Reija describes a sense of separateness from infancy. What parts of your own childhood made you feel most secure or most separate?  
• How can reflecting on childhood memories—both joyful and challenging—offer insight into your current self?
 

Belonging & Identity
• Reija struggles to fit in, at times feeling compelled to hide her Finnish heritage. Have you ever hidden an aspect of yourself for acceptance? What did that experience teach you?
• In what ways have you balanced the desire to belong with the need to honor your true self?
 

Transitions & Uprooting
• The memoir shows Reija’s repeated moves—from one house to another, and across continents. Recall a time you went through a major change (e.g., new city, new job, or a big life transition). What helped you cope or adapt? 
• What role do uncertainty and impermanence play in your life? Do they bring fear, excitement, or both?
 

Family & Ancestral Trauma
• Reija comes to see that her family’s history (from war displacement to generational trauma) shaped her in unseen ways. In your own family, do you notice any recurring patterns or traumas passed down?  
• How might recognizing ancestral or family patterns help you respond differently in the present?
 

Relationships & Conflict
• Throughout the memoir, Reija faces limits imposed by others—family, marriage, and even institutions—each testing her autonomy in new ways. How have you managed situations where your freedom conflicted with other people’s control or expectations? 
• Think about a recurring conflict in your life—family, romantic, or otherwise. What do you notice about how you respond, and what might that reveal about your past experiences?
 

Self-Discovery Through Travel
• Throughout the memoir, Reija’s moves between countries—and her subsequent returns “home”—show that travel can be both inspiring and disorienting. How do you think unfamiliar environments can accelerate personal growth?
• Have you experienced a moment in travel (even a short distance from home) that changed your perspective? How?
 

Healing & Mental Health
• In the memoir, Reija reaches a breaking point and realizes she needs help to address her anxiety and unresolved trauma. What are some signs that you—or someone close to you—may be ready to seek help?
• Which self-care or healing methods have been most effective for you, and why do you think they resonate with you?
 

Spirituality & Inner Resources
• Many chapters reveal how nature, meditation, or spiritual insight ground Reija during upheaval. What “inner resources” or practices help you find calm in stressful times?
• Consider a time you felt deeply connected to something larger than yourself (through nature, spiritual practice, creativity, or community). How did that shape your outlook?
 

Homecoming & Ancestral Return
• Across the years, Reija’s sense of “home” changes—each return to Finland or Australia feels familiar yet different, while life in Japan and then the United States brings its own challenges of belonging. How has your own idea of home shifted through the places and relationships that have shaped you?
• If you were to return to a childhood place or a family homeland, what would you hope to discover or resolve?
 

Forgiveness & Reconciliation
• The memoir touches on Reija’s journey to forgive her parents, ancestors, and even herself. Do you find forgiveness to be more of a one-time event or a process? Why?
• Who in your life—or which part of yourself—might benefit from greater compassion or forgiveness?
 

Integrating the Past & Present
• Reija recognizes that old wounds and gifts coexist. Think about something challenging in your life that eventually revealed a hidden strength. How might accepting the past alter the present?
• Is there any aspect of your personal or family history that you find difficult to accept? What step could you take toward acknowledging it more fully?
 

Purpose & Passing Down a New Legacy
• As Reija works through ancestral traumas, she speaks of passing down something different—love, healing, or new possibilities. If you could pass down one key lesson or energy to future generations (whether your children or your community), what would it be? 
• Reflect on how your journey so far has equipped you to change certain family patterns or cultural scripts.
 

Closing Reflections
• Now that you’ve read Across 4 Continents, which moment or chapter resonated with you the most, and why?
• In what ways did Reija’s story inspire you to reconsider or reaffirm your own path in life?