Closing One Door, Opening Another

Reija Bolwell

Oct 16, 2025

3 min read

For more than five years, I’ve contemplated my future as a boudoir photographer. This role was such an important part of my life that letting go—despite a clear call to change directions—hasn’t been easy. My studio is still set up with lights and props: the antique couch, the old railway trunk, and more.

I initially closed because of Covid restrictions. I saw it as an opportunity to dedicate my time to writing a book that had been waiting in my psyche for several years. But even when I could have reopened my studio, I chose not to. I didn’t want to distract myself from something that felt deeply important to finish—no matter how difficult it was at times or how long it was taking.

During my writing journey, I began to cherish my time in the studio in a different way—working quietly, creating behind the scenes, allowing space for deeper reflection.

While I loved the people I met and the beautiful images we created, I wasn’t ready to return to what photography required of me. But I wasn’t ready to let it go either. There was a special kind of magic in the sessions.

Very early in my photography career, I began to notice how transformative the experience could be. Even before seeing their images, I was often surprised by the quiet confidence emerging in my clients. A boudoir session, by its nature, can feel exposing and might stir up fears or insecurities—it takes courage to be so vulnerable. Yet once the session began, those feelings often softened and were replaced by a sense of ease, freedom, and empowerment that came from moving beyond them.

Instead of closing completely, I placed "Closed Until Further Notice" banners on every page of my website and left them there for years. I couldn’t bring myself to move forward because of how much my photography has meant to me.

Until now.

They say, When one door closes, another one opens. But what about the space in between—the hallway—when we’re standing there trying to decide which door is ours?

That’s where I’ve been.

I finished and published my book, but I haven’t quite stepped fully into the room of being an author. To be an author requires more of me—to continue sharing my story, to market my book, and to keep writing.

I’ve been standing in that hallway with two doors open, wondering if I can have both. Maybe I could, if I pushed hard enough—but that’s not what I want. I can’t give both the care they deserve without sacrificing balance and peace. I know I need to focus on one thing at a time. And I also know that I can open the photography door again someday, even if I close it now.

I've finally transformed my boudoir website into my author website. This post carries over the essence of my earlier work—a bridge between what was and what is now unfolding.

Today, I’m celebrating this transition with a few of my favorite portfolio images. Although the true power of photography was never just in the final images, it was in the transformation that happened during the session itself. Each session invited my clients to become present in the moment and connect more deeply within—and from that place, their natural beauty shone through.

I’m deeply honored to have been part of creating such intimate art.

Now I gently close the door, knowing that choosing one door is an act of love.